Express My Views #5: Response to Interracial Dating Rant (AM/BW)

Many of my readers may not know (or may have guessed) but I am interested in the topic of Interracial relationships especially AM/BW which shouldn’t be surprising since I have been interested in Asian culture for a long time now. I wrote a post about it before but I would like to do a response to Ranier who has made several posts about Interracial relationships. I wanted to reply from a black women’s point of view.

1. Cocky White Girls? Black Women = Angels?

Ranier was saying that Asians are pushing for Black women? Well, over here in the UK I think most of them prefer any other race than us. I have never seen an AM/BW couple however I have seen an AW/BM couple once which surprised me but that was a long time ago. But it does make me happy to see his support to this rare interracial couple.

2. Why are Asian guys so shy?

When Ranier replies to any questions involving relationships, his response is quite witty yet not too harsh on the reader. In my opinion, I can understand what he meant in this topic. Not all Asian guys are shy but in my experience, they are. And I do agree with the points he made: most guys aren’t interested (especially dating outside their race) and they are preoccupied with school and work.

In fact, some people who take up an interest in their culture (especially the growth of teenagers to Chinese, Japanese and Korean culture) already know these things and as most girls who are not Asian like me still want an Asian boyfriend. The ones who are not ignorant and know that being direct isn’t the right way are trying to make friends first.

3.Things Asian Guys Hate: Non-Asian Girls that have an Asian Fetish

Leading onto the point of people taking an interest in the culture. There is a difference between the people who are obsessed and the people who are passionate about Asian culture. Yes, some people take it to the extreme. I know people who dress like Gyaru’s, seen people who cosplay to look just like anime characters and the craziest K-Pop fans in London that you can imagine…but the thing is, that’s who they are and that’s what people like to do.

The people who are passionate have a difference to the people who are obsessed – learning about the culture and even the language. They take the time to learn another language, I’ve learnt that when you speak to someone in their own language they are shocked yet appreciate the fact you have taken the time to start learning it. Which goes to show there are people who actually spend time learning about it and visiting the country.

I am both passionate and obsessed, I admit that. It’s been 5 years since I took an interest in Chinese, Japanese and Korean (mostly the last two). But I’m smart enough to be myself like Ranier wants most people to be. Apart from my interest in the Asian culture, I also like to read, travel, dance and play video games which might sound boring to others but that’s me. And unlike some who just aim for a Korean boy, at least I know that Korean idols are not a portrayal of all Korean guys, most of them are plastic beauties and K-Pop does not reflect the Korean culture as some fans believe it does.

4. All about AMBW: Issues

One of my issues is hair – definitely! I’m not as confident as most black women. Actually, the one thing I wish I had was an Asian women’s hair but I wouldn’t take care of it well. Thank goodness for weave, if only there were more shops in Asia for black people though. Ranier also talked about when people refer to real beauty in the Black and Asian community with examples of artists such as Beyoncé and idols such as T.O.P. In a way, I can understand what he means by this. But there is a reason why both communities get angry over this. Beyoncé does not look like an average black woman. Her hair is lighter and her body is curvy but not to the extent that represents black women since she is an artist, her body is practically toned. But it also goes for T.O.P too. He dyes his hair a lot and his deep voice when he raps may attract a lot of women but it’s not common, is it?

Also, limiting yourself to one race? Of course, you shouldn’t do that. But may I say, certain people are attracted to other people for their appearance anyways. What can we do if more people are attracted to Asian people through the music? We can’t stop who they like. Especially me. But I’m not limiting myself either. But from the guys who have approached me in the street for my number? They are all the same race as me and I can tell they aren’t looking for a relationship. ¬_¬ It’s probably why I’m more into Asian boy – or even a Mixed race boy.

5. Finding Love In Korea = Bullshit

Which brings me to the last point, we all know this wouldn’t happen as easily as some people think it would. With Ranier’s point on the fact that most fans want a Korean boyfriend, I blame the media, companies and word-of-mouth. It is mainly the music and also manga/manhwa that fans are addicted to and with the companies producing pretty boys or as ab machines, it only continues the obsession.

But think of it this way, fans of K-Pop are starting to like Asian guys and the media used to portray them in an negative way. The increase in interracial relationships will grow.